Cosmic Retrograde Challenge (Day 3)

Linda from litebeing chronicles set up a wonderful challenge to coincide “With Mercury going retrograde next Monday on October 21, 2013 and a new series of eclipses starting this Friday October 18, 2013 in Aries, and then on Sunday November 3, 2013 in Scorpio“. I decided to take part in it.

The challenge was:

1- Find an item you never use or never wear but you feel very drawn to. It could be an article of clothing like a hat or jeans, or a CD that you haven’t played in years. Hang up a poster or picture that is hiding in a closet. Prepare a few meals from an old favorite cookbook that’s been neglected. Reread an old novel. Wear that old hat. Play that album. Wear an old scent that you are fond of. Watch several episodes of an old television series. Find something old that still resonates for you NOW.

2- Wear the item or use the object or perform the activity repeatedly for  a minimum of one week ; three weeks would be ideal.

3- Observe your thoughts and feelings to assess any significant changes.

4-Then journal or meditate on your experiences to gain more clarity.

5- Finally, blog about what you have discovered.

This is my contribution to the challenge. Firstly, it’s awesome that the date I thought I had asked for wasn’t what I got! Okay…maybe that doesn’t make sense. You see, I thought I’d asked for  the 19th of November to post , but when the list came out Linda slotted me for the 11th ( by the way it *was* the date I had asked for…I checked), which means this post comes out on the 11th day of the 11th month and to make it even more awesome I’ve scheduled it for 11:11 am 😀 (11 being a cool number. You can read about it  here )

So, here’s the thing . This thing about the old and it’s significance in the now…that started happening to me about a week or two (make that three weeks)  BEFORE that Mercury fella went retrograding. However, I’ve got a list of things that I’d like to share and here goes :

1. Early in the month I received an unexpected email from a friend. Someone with whom I had had no contact with for I think more than a year. We didn’t part in a bad way, not then or not that I can remember but receiving this email was a surprise. I replied said email which got a reply to which I replied and it went on from there for a few emails. And I wondered, okay…is there a significance with the reappearance of this person in  my life? Am I supposed to learn anything from this? Or am I making a spiritual mountain out of a “these things can happen” molehill.

The thing about me is  I used to be able to feel guilty at the drop of a hat…your hat, not mine. I was the person who would get terrified if someone close to me got angry because I would think it’s my fault…because it’s always my fault! I used to be the person who would wisely say “You know we can only do so much. We can’t force someone into doing something for themselves unless they wanted to” and the next second try to fix someone’s problems and get frustrated when I feel they aren’t getting it. Oh…and then I’d feel guilty for doing that. Basically I was that person who had a very sore forehead thanks to many many “self face palm” moments.

What I realised was, this isn’t me so much now. Of course, the self face palms keep coming, a little less than before but that guilt and fear of not being “up to notch” or “being that good friend” wasn’t rearing it’s ugly head! To be totally honest, it did a little. At the time I received one of those back and forth emails, I felt it creeping up on me. “You need to answer it NOW. If you don’t “person” may think you are AVOIDING “person”. Then it will be all. your.fault”, to which I am glad to report I did not listen to. Nope. I was going to have my coffee first. I was only going to answer the email when I wasn’t too tired and could respond. And you know what? I’m really happy said voice shriveled up and left me alone!

2. Many, many moons ago when my grubby paws landed on a good book I’d become lost within it’s pages. I would sit down on one spot with my essentials (air conditioning remote, cigarettes, ash tray, bottle of water, snacks) neatly arranged all around me. I’d only leave said spot for a trip to attend to nature’s call and a shower. Meals were taken at said spot, plate balanced carefully on a cushion, book within reading distance. Sleep…ah..sleep…well one can survive with 2 to 3 hours of sleep!

I hadn’t done that for SO long, I’d completely forgotten how it felt. So, lacking a new good juicy novel  I decided to make this an opportunity to revisit two old things : 1. Getting lost in a good book 2. To read Insomnia by Stephen King.

Let me tell you..it was awesome! The story was awesome the second time round. Dedicating one day without any guilt to just read, read, read was also awesome! I loved it! Whenever that little voice came up saying “You should be DOing something constructive” ..I rolled my eyes at it and told it to shut up..hehe.

The experience made me go out and get a new book…you know to get lost in…again. I did! And it was awesome too! It was a good feeling. It was giving me permission to enjoy a luxury  I had long forgotten. It made me smile and it made the hours of the day pass through wonderfully. It was also incredible to read a good fiction (and for me it was King style) instead of what I’d been reading for the past year or so.

3. I decided to wear this Moldavite pendant I had bought a couple of years ago. It was the very first crystal pendant I purchased for myself and hadn’t used it for more than 2 years. This however didn’t work out too well.

Before I continue, this is a me being me moment to cherish. Only now that I want to link Moldavite for those who would like to know about it, do I actually come across an article that explains why this little experiment didn’t work so well….never mind, let’s proceed.

I wore that pendant, but it lasted less than a week. After reading the article I’ve linked, I think it’s because the energies were just too strong for me. It left me drained. I also felt very heavy specially in my chest area…so much so I had to wake up in the middle of the night and remove it. I felt a little better after that and haven’t worn it since. But again me being me…I’m thinking I’ll keep using it, just not everyday, but maybe every night when I sleep. We’ll see.

4. Ho’oponopono: I went for a little group session given for free by a practitioner at the Violet Flame, near where I live. If cleansing has anything to do with Mercury going retrograde, this one helped a lot. I started saying the little prayer of four lines every day for 2 weeks, all the time. My sister says that as we clear stuff from within us and as we become more aware or sensitive we open ourselves up to the denser vibrations around us. I don’t know if that’s what happened but dang, clearing all the time is tiring! Well..it made me feel really tired! I still say it though but not ALL the time. Now I say it when my buttons get pushed or when people tell me something  energetically dense. Sometimes I forget to say it, but I don’t beat myself up over it, but when I do remember, I say it.

Has it helped in any way? I don’t really know. I *do* know that a couple of Sundays ago I had a pretty major clearing which happened. It’s too long to write about here and I’m not sure if I should. I know there is a message that I could share if I did post it but again…I’m not sure.

Over all I enjoyed this challenge because it made me a little more aware than I used to be and helped to reconnect to one of my passions…reading a good novel. It also helped me learn that though at times changes which occur within us maybe so small and subtle that we don’t see it, but there will come along a little something that helps us realise that we have changed…which is a good thing 🙂

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If you would like to read the other posts linked to this challenge:

Heidi’s post (Day 2: 10th November)

Karen’s post ( Day 4: 12th November)

Linda’s list of participating bloggers

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Please click the badges below to link up to NaBloPoMo-ers 🙂

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32 thoughts on “Cosmic Retrograde Challenge (Day 3)

  1. Dear Shree,
    Thank you for taking part in the challenge with such zeal and writing a lovely account of your journey. After reading the link on Moldavite, it is clear you picked a doozy 🙂 One takeaway is to learn about the stone or crystal before you wear it 🙂

    But on second thought ~

    Before I continue, this is a me being me moment to cherish. Only now that I want to link Moldavite for those who would like to know about it, do I actually come across an article that explains why this little experiment didn’t work so well….never mind, let’s proceed. : I think there is something otherworldly in this realization, more about process than content. Maybe a type of reverse synchronicity? I cannot fully explain it, but it seems like you forgot what you already knew subconsciously about the Moldavite on some level and your desire to retrieve this knowledge took the form of providing a link?

    I may be going off on a tangent here but so far I am noticing that throughout the challenge there are levels of mystery and revelation that slowly unfold within the larger more sweeping changes. I will let you ponder this!

    much love and gratitude,
    Linda

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    1. Thank you, Linda for giving us the opportunity to participate in this little exercise, which didn’t feel so little when we did it! Hehe.

      I get what you mean about the Moldavite. I chose it, I had a learning experience from it, and it made me search for a site to link the crystal to, this gave me the incentive to actually read about the crystal, which in turn made me realise some things about myself 😉

      Magic is indeed every where and so are miracles. We just need to see them…you taught me this through your blog posts. Actually made me realise it by writing about your experiences 🙂

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    1. Hahaha…another me being me moment: I *thought* I had asked you for the 19th of November…but I had actually asked for the 11th..not even realising the significance of the date! I basically wanted the post to go up on a Monday because I could pre write and schedule it the week before that 😛 LOL

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  2. Loved your challenge Shree, and Moldavite is such a powerful crystal. I have a small piece which I keep in my pouch. 🙂 It seems this Cosmic Retrograde challenge is giving permissions to free ourselves and clear out that which we no longer need.. I hope my own post does Linda’s Challenge justice in a few days time…
    Much Love and Oh yes… Remember to breathe this November as you have so so much going on at the moment! LOVE to you 🙂 xxx

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    1. Hey Sue! Thank you 🙂
      I’m sure your post is going to be enchantingly awesome 😀
      This Cosmic Retrograde is definitely making changes, but what I notice it that different people are experiencing it differently. But as Linda mentions in her comment, the underlying themes prevail

      I shall remember to breathe!! LOL. I’m not putting *too* much pressure on myself…I think.

      Much love to you and a big *hug* 🙂

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      1. Big Hugs Back, Yes Mega pressures, November write a day posts lol and all those extra hours working too, phew I don’t know how you do it… I hope you and your sister are getting plenty of Bathroom breaks! LoL

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  3. I used to be that person too, Shree! But I think it’s not possible to live that way… it’s like punishing ourselves all the time for no reason… Plus a lot of people do not even care about what and how we feel. Soooo… it’s a waste of energy.

    Hope you had a great weekend!!!
    xx

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    1. Haha..yes it is a waste of energy. It’s not an easy habit to break away from but I’ve seen progress within, which is all good 🙂

      And good on you for breaking away from it too!

      I had a pretty good weekend! Thank you 🙂
      Hope yours went well too!

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  4. What an interesting and revealing experience you’ve shared. The reappearance of an old friend or person from another time is especially compelling. Recognizing old patterns or beliefs about oneself that no longer apply feels good!

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    1. Thank you 🙂 And yes it does feel good! It feel uncomfortable too…because it’s a change and sometimes our ego doesn’t like change…but recognising the uncomfortable feeling is a good thing too! At least we won’t fall into the same trap again or if we do..we can’t say that we didn’t realise it 😉

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    1. Yes..it is true what you say Peter. I guess the thing is we confuse caring for trying to fix people or things…and for me I took that burden all on myself with no request from the other side at all! But that’s not a very weird thing..I feel most of us, one time or another have done that too.

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  5. Hi Shree, great post! 🙂
    You have – had – thought within thoughts within thoughts because you are so aware of yourself; I know because this is how i have felt too. A part of us watches the rest of us, constantly questioning and challenging… which can be a good thing if we can take control of it – and you have. The downside though is always being aware when other people are not as aware as we can be and then getting annoyed at them….!
    The being tired because of clearing? I would say that is due to letting go of all that negative/dense energy. I tend to go into a ‘Reiki trance’ when doing a self-healing… clearing out negativity does something to our bodies, even our soul, and we need to ‘stock up’ again on our own, healthier energy. That’s why this happens.
    Anyway, enough blabbering from me – glad you had fun and enjoyed your discoveries 🙂

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    1. Hi Heidi!
      Wow…thank you for that comment. I don’t “see” it with me so sometimes it’s great to get some sort of affirmation (?) that I’m going down the right path!

      LOL…so many times I don’t even see it as someone not being aware…I don’t know…maybe it’s like an old pattern within me that doesn’t allow me to see that I am being aware..or something..

      As for the being tired when doing the clearing..thank you for shedding light on that!

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  6. Awesome introspection Shree! I just recently learned about Ho’oponopono too. Forgiving is so healing. That is so cool about the stone Moldavite, even though you could not wear it long. The linked article was very interesting on Moldavite too.
    xoxo
    Karen

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    1. Thanks Karen!
      Ho’oponopono is quite an enlightening experience. For me, it’s made me allow myself to become more aware…and for some reason I think that starting it has opened doors from deep inside to allow other negative thought patterns and programs to emerge…I just experienced one today and it was….an experience alright…haha.

      I’ve started using the Moldavite again, but this time just for a part of the day only…taking it slow 🙂

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      1. Hello Shree,
        Ho’oponopono is such a different way of thinking.. So much releasing of unneeded baggage so deep within! Some days it seems there is healing every day on something, whether it is large or small.
        I will look for moldavite and see if I can come across a piece of it to experiment with too!
        xoxo
        Karen

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        1. Hey Karen 🙂
          Yes it is a different way of thinking and at the same time not. It’s like taking something and stretching it out some more. And yes…SO much for clearing…ugh..where *do* we put all this stuff!!
          Hope you have a good experience with Moldavite!!

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          1. Hello Shree,
            When I have people release and forgive, I ask them to send it out into the earth outside and I believe there the negative with transmute into positive. I have not found Moldavite yet…
            xoxo
            Karen

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